Showing posts with label Operational Research jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Operational Research jokes. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

American Doctors Thoughts on Obama's Health Transformation

Came across this article on Capgemini's Health Transformation blog: Doctors thoughts about Obamacare. It is too funny not to share. Also note, it is most likely written by an American, or someone connected to the American healthcare system, due to the word usage of "Anesthesiologists" and "Pediatricians", because in the UK, people would say "Anaesthetists" and "Paediatricians", while in Canada, it would be "Anaesthesiologists" and "Paediatricians" - much like the word choice of "trash", "rubbish", and "garbage". :)

Members of the medical community has weighed in on the new health care plan being developed by the Obama Team:

The Allergists thought that it should be scratched,
and the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologists had a bad gut feeling about it,
while the Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.

The Obstetricians felt Obama is laboring under a misconception.

Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.

Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!"
while the Pediatricians said, 'Oh, Grow up!'

The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness,
while the Radiologists could see right through it.

Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.

The Internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow,
and the Plastic Surgeons said, "This puts a whole new face on the matter."

The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward,
but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.

The Anesthesiologists thought the idea was a gas,
and the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

In the end, the Proctologists won out,
leaving the entire decision up to the a**holes in Washington!

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Breakfast optimization :)

At the end of his course on mathematical methods in optimization, the professor sternly looks at his students and says: "There is one final piece of advice I'm going to give you now: Whatever you have learned in my course - never ever try to apply it to your personal lives!"

"Why?" the students ask.

"Well, some years ago, I observed my wife preparing breakfast, and I noticed that she wasted a lot of time walking back and forth in the kitchen. So, I went to work, optimized the whole procedure, and told my wife about it."

"And what happened?!"

"Before I applied my expert knowledge, my wife needed about half an hour to prepare breakfast for the two of us. And now, it takes me less than fifteen minutes..."